to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
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