babies were throwing up all over the place
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
