I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
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