They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
