somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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