All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
