so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Randomize
