No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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