i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
