brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
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