This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
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