Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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