dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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