Texts From Last Night

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  (517): View more from Michigan

  Alarm just got pulled in my exam

  (517): View more from Michigan

  Swear it wasn't me

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  (517): Alarm just got pulled in my exam (517): Swear it wasn't me http://tfl.nu/3yrm
  Replies (2) Good night (1976) Bad night (662)
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  (845): View more from New York

  Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon

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  (845): Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon http://tfl.nu/pdkb
  Replies (16) Good night (699) Bad night (4954)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!

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  (612): I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome! http://tfl.nu/jbu3
  Replies (21) Good night (5578) Bad night (595)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars

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  (608): so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars http://tfl.nu/jmti
  Replies (13) Good night (4815) Bad night (576)
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  (315): View more from New York

  he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate

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  (315): he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate http://tfl.nu/wroe
  Replies (24) Good night (930) Bad night (5108)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.

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  (636): Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often. http://tfl.nu/ixlv
  Replies (15) Good night (4631) Bad night (737)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.

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  (925): I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time. http://tfl.nu/c4ll
  Replies (23) Good night (4429) Bad night (908)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.

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  (443): she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs. http://tfl.nu/nz73
  Replies (13) Good night (8083) Bad night (1238)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock

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  (443): WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock http://tfl.nu/0ctc
  Replies (4) Good night (3688) Bad night (1049)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...

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  (713): Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation... http://tfl.nu/5jek
  Replies (8) Good night (2313) Bad night (1186)
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.

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  (778): It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman. http://tfl.nu/chx9
  Replies (8) Good night (1857) Bad night (1493)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.

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  (734): I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW. http://tfl.nu/ynr9
  Replies (10) Good night (2584) Bad night (617)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you

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  (812): I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you http://tfl.nu/vw2w
  Replies (15) Good night (1941) Bad night (655)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?

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  (505): Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away? http://tfl.nu/yzva
  Replies (4) Good night (1972) Bad night (533)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.

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  (720): New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air. http://tfl.nu/zwsc
  Replies (1) Good night (784) Bad night (272)

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