D3 body, D1 cock
Come see our sink grown plant.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Randomize
