And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
operation have a gay friend backfired
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I think I sprained my soul last night
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
