What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
