margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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