I think I am morally bankrupt
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
sick fucks of a feather flock together
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
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