are you still at the devil's house?
Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
