Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
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