we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize
