Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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