He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
