This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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