After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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