I wannas sexs uuuuu
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
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