My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Randomize
