called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
