The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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