you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
