I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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