I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize