You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
