dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize