the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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