It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I am available for nakedness
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
