I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize