she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
