when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Tell her she can't have a vagina
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize
