Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
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