were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Randomize
