well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Randomize
