Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
