We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize