Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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