got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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