If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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