I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
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