New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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