Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
i out mim tonsoeep
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